I was born 25 years ago in a tiny fishing boat called the S.S. Starkist just outside of Long Island. A deadly storm was brewing and my frightened mum stuffed
me into a glass bottle and set me out to sea, hoping someone would find me after I'd washed ashore. 3 days later (thank GOD for Lunchables!) I was
discovered by a couple of wealthy Manhattanites out to dump a body in the Hudson River. They took me in and made me the man I was yesterday. Today I've
changed. It's a bright new day! Won't you celebrate with me?
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